Our understanding of love really has become a mess! It's hardly surprising looking at the stuff the media churns out, which portray love as a kind of fun pastime. It seems that love nowadays is confined to emotions and feelings rather than commitment and honesty. Actually it's all these things.

Christian love is to give
What would be the ultimate act of love? - probably laying down your life for someone. In the image above we see exactly this - the giving of oneself unconditionally to others, as Jesus did for us. But giving love without a need is meaningless. So God created beings that need love, and that could partake in the giving of love which is ultimately what fulfills. In this giving and receiving, we end up with broadly two types of love that most people are familiar with.

1) Love given unconditionally can be called gift-love -also called Divine love as it most closely resembles love Himself (God) An example would be the unconditional sacrifice of Christ. Gift loves are the most godly. Giving, joyful, energetic, patient, willing to forgive, desiring the good of the beloved. All these are images of divine life. Our model of gift love displayed by Jesus is not only at Calvary, but in the workshop, the crowds, the demands and oppositions, lack of peace and privacy and constant interruptions.

2) Loves that arises out of a need to be loved can be called need-loves. - also called natural loves because they are earthly -not Divine. Interestingly the dictionary definition gives us predominantly descriptions of need-love. Examples would be affection, friendship. These nouns denote feelings of warm personal attachment that are often reciprocated. Need love might be called selfish but no-one ever said a child was selfish for craving its mother's love or an adult for the affection of a friend. Since we do in reality need each other - this love is perfectly acceptable. It's our need that brings us to God!